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Does going into the hospital NOT as a patient trigger anxiety?
This past weekend my nephew broke his femur and we had to go to the hospital for him. Unfortunately, he is going into surgery for it because it was a really bad break. He is only 4 years old and it was the hardest thing of my life to see him in so much pain and not be able to do anything about it.
I can remember being around 5 the first time I recall actually being in a hospital. It is so scary and unpredictable. Like my nephew, I always wanted to know what was going to happen and wanted the truth. It was so hard for me to watch him go through pain and being given medications and surrounded by the surgeons and doctors.
As much as I kept my emotions strong for him and strictly focused on him and making sure he was getting what he needed, when I went home I couldn’t help but cry. It was very emotional and brought back a lot of feelings and trauma that I can remember going through at that age. I didn’t let these emotions out in front of him and was very honest and told him what was happening.
Do you ever find yourself experiencing anxiety when going to the hospital NOT as a patient? Do you react strongly with anxiety or feelings of PTSD when you are the one waiting on a family member/close friend/significant other if they are getting surgery? I know it’s only normal to feel anxious and worried but having lived through so much trauma myself I feel like it’s heightened. How do you process these emotions?
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2 Replies
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I feel heartless for saying this, but quite the opposite for me. I am SO used to hospitals, needles, surgery, etc. that it almost feels comforting and I don’t get worked up easily. I feel bad for my husband if he ever needs to go to the doctor just because I know he hates it but I am much calmer about it than he is.
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Everyone reacts differently. I felt like an absolute pro being in there and it felt good to be able to advocate for my nephew and know that I was doing everything in my power to make him get the best of the best care. But at the end of the day, when my adrenaline wore off, my emotions seemed to get the best of me and I just cried for hours. It was a strange day, a lot to process and seeing a child in pain like that just is NOT good. I give so much credit to my parents, friends, and family for being on the other side of that waiting room too many times. It’s almost easier as the patient, the worry is what killed me!
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