H.O.P.E.: Hold on, pain ends. This acronym came across my phone screen as I was scrolling through social media last month. Despite my physical pain and emotional discomfort, I laughed and thought to myself, “Whoever came up with this acronym has clearly never dealt with chronic pain. Pain doesn’t…
Recharged and Rewired - a Column by Brittany Foster
With a history of eight major cardiovascular surgeries, I’m often assumed to be a pro at recovering from an operation. Maybe so, but no matter how many surgeries or procedures I endure, it never gets easier. I’m now healing after a successful bypass revision of two of my…
Dear Future Self, I know you’ve been experiencing days that feel like years. Living with a body that feels out of control and a mind that must react isn’t easy. The combination of depression, anxiety, and physical pain is exhausting. I know that right now, you may…
For the past few months, I’ve been fighting a body that feels like it’s knocking me down. In addition to my chronic hypoxia and pulmonary hypertension (PH), my gastrointestinal (GI) system has continued to lose function. I’ve needed an increased amount of oxygen and have been more dependent…
“I have to shower immediately. I’ll get all of these EKG lead stickers off of me and erase the hospital.” That was the first thought that came to my mind after a hypoxic, or low-oxygen, episode sent me to the hospital the other weekend. Showering after a hospitalization…
My two favorite female singers, Celine Dion and Carrie Underwood, have songs about love and the power it holds. Dion belted out the following lyrics in her timeless classic “The Power of Love”: “We’re heading for something/ Somewhere I’ve never been/ Sometimes I am frightened/ But I’m ready…
“There were nights of endless pleasure. It was more than any laws allow.” Celine Dion’s “It’s All Coming Back to Me Now” is a classic. As I sang along, I couldn’t help but wonder, what kind of sex is Celine Dion having, and where can I sign up? One of…
I recall waking up in a full-body sweat every time I had a nightmare as a child. The nightmare was always the same and involved my two sisters, a kidnapper, and me. In the dream, I’d sprint, screaming and sobbing, after the kidnapper’s car, where my sisters were held captive.
My mind once seemed wired to focus on parts of me I wish I could change. Most of my life, I struggled to accept my reflection in the mirror. I spent a lot of time hoping for the scars to fade and the fluid retention to dissipate. I tore…
In the movie “13 Going on 30,” the character Jenna Rink sits in a closet crying on her 13th birthday. Distressed about her birthday celebrations going awry, Jenna longs to skip her teen years and go directly to the age of 30. “I just want to be 30. Thirty,…
“Don’t mind the pacemaker on the left side of my chest — it sticks out. I hope you’re not grossed out by the port because you can see the tunneling of the line under the skin. I’m sorry about that.” In an attempt at an…
I’m often asked, “What is something that makes you happy?” Sometimes it’s by a friend reaching out to support me during a difficult week, or it might be a therapist helping me through a period of depression. Whatever the context, I’ve always struggled to answer it. When I thought…
