-
What’s the best thing others can say when you’re struggling?
Last week, I stumbled upon an article that immediately grabbed my attention, and I knew I had to discuss it with our forum members.
Here’s the gist of what struck me the most.We’ve all been there, right? We feel the weight of the world on our shoulders amid a struggle.
And it’s not just us; our friends and family face their battles, too. One line from the article hit home: “Sometimes, we don’t know what we need.”
Wow, right?Considering that we all face these challenging moments, I’m curious—what are the most comforting words someone can offer you when navigating through your darkest times?
-
16 Replies
-
“If there’s anything I can do, let me know.” No sympathy, just letting you know there’s someone there if you need them.
-
Hi, @Steve Sallee. Yes, that is an incredible one. Others must offer support when and if needed. That’s not sympathy but support. It also leaves it in our hands when we are ready and need help.
It’s wonderful to see you posting. How are you? Staying busy?
-
Doing very well. Extremely busy. Not enough time in the day.
-
Hi, @Steve Sallee; that’s a wonderful problem, right? Moreover, post-transplant, when I bet you want to make up for “lost time,” I bet you do!
Thanks for sharing- please pop in every so often and let us know what trouble you’re getting into, hehe.
-
-
-
“I love you and I’m here for you.”
-
OMG, yes, @Terese Tuohey. My husband, closest friends, and family tell me this. Knowing this is tremendous support, especially in our most challenging times.
“I love you, and I’m here for you” is so simple but powerful when struggling, right?
I am looking forward to seeing you and supporting you in Indy. 💜🤗
-
-
It comforts me to hear someone say, “slow down. One day at a time, one problem at a time.” I’m worried about the future, possible transplants, spinning myself into a frenzy and I need to be reminded to rein in my thoughts.
-
Hi, @Joanne Sperando . Yes, this is an incredible reminder. I, too often, find my thoughts run away with me. My hubby and daughter seem to have ways to get me more grounded.
I can only imagine how difficult this has been for you as you are worried about these valid things and your reality! Have you heard any updates on whether your PH team will start you on Winrevair(sotatercept)?
Keeping you close in my thoughts, my PHriend. Please know we are always here too, and can remind each other to rein in our thoughts when needed. 🤗
-
I appreciate that Jen! Yes, we’re talking about it for sure.
-
Hi, @Joanne Sperando ; my thoughts and prayers continue for you. Please keep us updated as you learn when this treatment will start from your PH team. 🙏
-
-
-
I’m in sort of in a different situation than you younger people. Us geezers are supposed to look a little on the feeble side. Most of my neighbors and friends are old like me and have health problems. So I am not unique or stand out. “How are you doing today?” is the common greeting around here. We support each other through the good and bad and lookout for one another. The guys I work with treat me normal……but……if get stuck or have some other problem that requires brute strength to get out of, the younger guys are quick to help. That makes my day.
As far as being in public, nobody can figure out I have any problems. I can pretty much blend in.
-
Hi, @Roger Bliss; your reply made me laugh! My dad, probably near your age, always tells me he will visit the “old folks.” Each time he says that I remind him that they are his age, and he replies that he knows that and laughs.
I imagine the Alaska where you live to be similar to my dad’s town—a small country town down south. Everyone knows everyone and keeps an eye on one another. Thanks for sharing your experience; it’s always interesting and offers a new perspective.
-
-
Well @Roger Bliss certainly can relate – just turned 80 but I still resist calling myself an old geezer. Sometimes when I am really struggling my husband just comes over and hugs me. He doesn’t have to say a word, just holds me. Our friends might just stop by with dinner all prepared and a note saying “with love”. Most of the time it is the simple jesters that warm my heart and make the struggles a little less ❤️.
-
Hi @Carol Volckmann, OMG, did I forget to wish you a Happy 80th Birthday? When was it, my sweet PHriend? Not an “old geezer” at all, none of you.
I, too, can relate to your comment about your hubby saying nothing but hugging you. Many will do that or reach in and grab me closer to him, reminding me I am not alone. You’re so right; the simple gestures or acts of kindness warm my heart. 💜
Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this topic.
-
-
Just today my psychotherapist said, “You have a lot to deal with. It’s understandable you are depressed.” She then reminded me of all the things I have told her I do to lift myself up. I felt better after our conversation.
-
Hi, @Linda Concoby. Amazingly, your therapist can help you see things from an outside perspective. I, too, have found that my therapy sessions help me better understand what I am carrying on my plate and how to cope with things.
Is this a new therapist for you or have you been seeing them? Have you noticed some improvement in your level of depression? Thanks for sharing how well she validated that you are dealing with a lot!
Let us know how we can best support you.
-
Log in to reply.