Pulmonary Hypertension News Forums Forums Life Challenges Mental Health How do you fill your cup on difficult days?

  • jen-cueva

    Member
    October 14, 2024 at 11:25 am

    I have found many things that tend to fill my cup. Here are a few I can think of:

    • The forums and support
    • Tine with loved ones and friends
    • Rest
    • Journaling-writing
    • Beach

      What about you? I also came across the article about what fills our cups and what drains them. It explains how to do a simple exercise to figure out what’s draining and feel your cup.

    https://turningthepage.co.nz/the-cup-paying-attention-to-what-fills-and-drains/

  • Colleen

    Member
    October 14, 2024 at 11:14 pm

    @jen-cueva great topic! Ditto…I like to fill my cup with the same things you do. What I would add is taking a drive to anywhere, preferably somewhere with limited traffic and pretty scenery.

    • jen-cueva

      Member
      October 16, 2024 at 2:12 pm

      Hi @Colleen , yes, I, too, love those drivers. My drives most often are near water. But a good old country road is also a great time to explore and refill our cups. On your drives, do you prefer the music up loud or the silence without music?

      We do have many things in common, so funny.

      💜

      • Colleen

        Member
        October 16, 2024 at 6:22 pm

        @jen-cueva most of the time I really like music playing but I’ll turn it off for a little bit to take in some quiet time too.

      • jen-cueva

        Member
        October 17, 2024 at 1:37 pm

        Hi @Colleen , I can certainly relate. At times, just the drive, windows down, and sunroof open to get the fresh air is all I need. There are times when I want quietness and will turn off the radio.

  • carol-volckmann

    Member
    October 16, 2024 at 6:44 pm

    Great topic. When I lived on the ocean, I would take long walks on the beach taking in all the sights, smells, air and feel refreshed. When we lived in the mountains, it was the same- long trail walks taking nature in as much as I could. No music just nature. Sailing … sitting in the cockpit at one of our favorite anchorages watching the sea birds, turtles coming to the surface – it has always been about nature for me.

    Several times when my cup has been empty, I would go for a swim and several times joined by 2 or 3 dolphins – they actually would swim with me. One day a female brought her calf either for me to see or teaching her calf. It was a spiritual experience.

    Moving to where we now live those special times to fill my cup are not that available so I fill it with our 2 year old Golden with huggable time – and, of course, with Dick. Dick can always fill my cup with his smile and touch.

    • jen-cueva

      Member
      October 17, 2024 at 1:47 pm

      Hi @carol-volckmann .

      Wow, I was taken back to such a serene setting as you shared about how nature fills your cup. Oh, that ocean air and the sounds of the waves are so relaxing. But I love that you shared how active you have been between walks along the beach, hiking, and swimming.

      The story where you’re swimming with the dolphins and the mom brought over her calf was so mystical, my dear PHriend. I bet you’ll never forget that experience. How long ago do you think that was?🐬

      But you now fill your cup with Mr. Cloud, and I can bet it’s often outdoors. Are you around the area that offers some nature trails close by? And yes, the gentle smile and touch of our partners are like a boost for our battery. 🔋

    • Colleen

      Member
      October 17, 2024 at 8:22 pm

      @carol-volckmann I felt calm just picturing all that you just shared. Wow, the dolphin experience! That is so special and I’m sure the memory still has a positive effect on you! I love the way you talk about Dick. You have such a special marriage and that makes me so happy for the both of you!

      The ocean is where I go without music. I can sit and listen to the surf all day! I haven’t gone alone yet since I moved back to NJ. It’s hard to explain but I think the day I finally do it will be emotional for me. Maybe that’s why I haven’t done it yet. I think I have a lot of emotions I need to get out and I know a day at the ocean alone is going to force me to deal with them. Oh shoot, I think I just brought the mood down! Don’t get me wrong, it will be a good thing for me to do!

      • jen-cueva

        Member
        October 18, 2024 at 1:50 pm

        Hi @Colleen , sweet friend, go alone to the ocean when you’re ready. When KK came home and was going through her divorce, the ocean was so good for her. Like you said, it was a ton of emotions, but it was where she let it all out.

        When you’re ready to go, I think you’ll be glad you did. You need that extra respite, and the beach will do that for you. You must have so many strong emotions stuck inside, and yes, getting them out will offer you a little peace, I bet. Extra gentle hugs, love, and prayers are with you, Colleen.🤗⛱

      • Colleen

        Member
        October 21, 2024 at 10:37 pm

        Thank you @jen-cueva for caring so much about my well being. I know I will make that drive to the shore in the near future and it will do me good…tears and all!

      • jen-cueva

        Member
        October 22, 2024 at 12:26 pm

        Hi @Colleen , thanks what friends do. I’m only reciprocating the love and support you continue to show us all. You’re one incredible and kind soul, my FWW and PHriend.

        Yes, when you are ready, it will be an overwhelming day of all emotions, I can imagine. 🤗🙏🦋

  • carol-volckmann

    Member
    October 18, 2024 at 3:59 pm

    Hello @Colleen My heart aches for you. You have had deep, deep loss and, I assume, have not had time to really let go and feel the depth. Jen is right, you will know when it is time and you will get there.

    The ocean, walking the beach, just sitting and watching the waves can be so very healing but it also can bring back memories of loss and loneliness. But at the moment of deep sadness comes healing energy.

    One day on a cold, windy day I was deeply depressed on my walk when suddenly I saw a Monarch Butterfly 🦋 on the wet sand near the edge of the water. I reached down and picked it up, cover it with my hands and breathed warm air into my hands. The 🦋 started to flutter and when I opened my hands it flew – a sense of wonder came over me and I smiled and walked further standing straighter and taking longer strides.

    The next day again I went on my walk. When I came to the spot I had seen the Butterfly 🦋 – a 🦋 landed on my arm, fluttering then flew away along with my depression – I let everything go and sobbed. When I finally stopped, my cup was filled with warm, loving memories.

    Colleen. Sweet and wonderful woman please know one day your cup will be filled with warm, loving moments ❤️.

    • jen-cueva

      Member
      October 21, 2024 at 5:27 pm

      Oh sweet, @carol-volckmann I love butterflies and always think of them as a loved one we lost who comes to say hello. In the mornings, as I sip my coffee or hot tea, I enjoy the beautiful sounds of nature from birds and see the butterflies.

      What a beautiful post you shared! You all continue to fill my cup…

    • Colleen

      Member
      October 21, 2024 at 10:35 pm

      @carol-volckmann thank you so much for sharing the butterfly experience. I love butterflies. They have always felt spiritual to me. I think I might borrow this memory of yours from time to time when I need some inspiration to go find some nature and heal my heart.

  • alex616

    Member
    October 21, 2024 at 11:55 am

    What has been found to be helpful for me is trying to live life day by day and always ensure that I set some time aside, even if I just sit down with a cup of tea in a quiet place. I also need to write signs and tests down on paper, it at least gives me somewhat of a sense of control.

    • jen-cueva

      Member
      October 21, 2024 at 5:24 pm

      Hi @alex616 , yes, having a cup of hot tea is a great way to have some”me” time. I’ve been doing this more often than my morning coffee lately. Do you have any favorite teas? Or do you usually stick to traditional teas?

      When you mention writing down signs and tests, are you referring to PH symptoms and testing? Oh boy, I can relate to tryinbg to find some tings to control. It’s challenging with PH, I know.

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