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  • Do You Continue to Date Your Significant Other Despite PH?

    Posted by jen-cueva on May 26, 2020 at 8:57 am

    I recently read an article that discussed those with chronic illness do not continue to date their significant others. The article was interesting as it went on to say that only about 5% of couples where one has a chronic illness make time for a “date night.” This was shocking for me to read.

    Living with PH and other conditions brings many challenges to a relationship. But, I find for me that continuing to have dates helps in my relationship. This “date night” may mean a midday brunch, lunch, or a Costco trip. Coffee dates count, too. The point is to find time to dedicate to your relationship/marriage.

    With PH, often our plans fail, this is why I find that small dates can be helpful. Although I enjoy a planned reservation type date night, too.

    What about y’all? Do you take time to focus on your relationship with your significant other? If so, do you enjoy brunch, lunch, or something else? If you are single, do you date often? Let’s talk about this.

    jen-cueva replied 3 years, 10 months ago 3 Members · 5 Replies
  • 5 Replies
  • Bill Jones

    Member
    May 28, 2020 at 2:49 pm

    Hi Jen. My wife and I still have our dates, probably even more so now just for something to do. It helps that I am working from home and not full days. Lately we go for a walk every day. I really don’t walk much because I am not able to, but she pushes me in my wheelchair and will cover about 3 to 4 miles. We have found some nice trails that aren’t too challenging for me or her when she is pushing. The paved trails are the best but some are decent crushed stone and relatively okay for the wheelchair. It is a perfect way to just enjoy the day, the birds and other wild life, flowers blooming and time together. Now that things are getting warmer we are looking forward to some trails along Lake Michigan which we have mapped out.
    Crazy as it sounds after all our years together with her raising our 4 boys who now are adults, and I was busy building our business and away a lot, we now are together day and night and it is wonderful. Once this covid-19 settles down I want her to take some time just for her now and then.

  • jen-cueva

    Member
    May 29, 2020 at 11:36 am

    Hi @bill-jones, I love that y’all take walks. My hubby and I have done some of these walks, too. Especially more now that COVID hit. I, like you, need a wheelchair for distances. He pushes me in my wheelchair. I find that taking in the beautiful nature is peaceful. I think this is something that we all need to do if possible. These walks can certainly be a date. The Lake Michigan trails sound beautiful. I hope that y’all can enjoy that soon.

    You mention your business, which business is this? I may have missed you talking about this.

    My hubby and I are “empty nesters”, too. Well, minus Sasha, our mini schnauzer.

  • Bill Jones

    Member
    May 29, 2020 at 12:11 pm

    Hi Jen, yes the walks are so needed right now with the COVID scare. The wheelchair is all new to me since January. Previously we would just use the wheelchair service going through airports as I still traveled for business and leisure a lot. when we were in at our home in Florida over in January, I had a business meeting in Dallas for a few days so I was planning on just taking the flight there and then fly home to Wisconsin afterwards. Well I wasn’t doing very good with the breathing and became very nervous about making the trip alone and also wasn’t sure if I had the energy to even due the 2 day meeting. So my son went ahead and handled it alone and did a super job. That’s when I ordered a wheelchair of my own and it has freed me from sitting and doing nothing and not being able to go anywhere. Currently I have canceled all of my business travels, and maybe someday will attend some on a smaller scale. I have been doing it for almost 35 years.
    Our business is a wholesale master distributor of specialty products for the plumbing, water and wastewater markets, mostly for underground corrosion protection.

  • Colleen

    Member
    May 29, 2020 at 2:35 pm

    @bill-jones making the decision to use a wheelchair isn’t easy. You might think it’s going to limit your quality of life but when we got one for my son we discovered it actually improved his mobility quite a bit. We eventually bought a used motor scooter but he didn’t get much use out of it. A month later he received his transplant and didn’t need it any longer.

    You must be so proud of your son and his ability to step in for you when needed. That’s when you know you did a fine job raising your kids.

    Your business sounds very important to you and I hope you will be able to enjoy a few trips in the future. Keep us updated.

  • jen-cueva

    Member
    May 31, 2020 at 11:16 am

    Hi @bill-jones, I can relate to the wheelchair decision. I remember when I first started using mine. I was against it for some time but found that I could enjoy more things if I would just use it.

    As @colleensteele, mentions that shows what an excellent job you have done raising your son.

    I am sorry to hear about you canceling your business trips. I am hopeful that you will find ways to be active in your business in ways that work with your PH. It sounds like you and you and your wife are both invested in your business. Take care.

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