Pulmonary Hypertension News Forums Forums Life Challenges Mental Health Does PH Affect Your Dreams?

  • Does PH Affect Your Dreams?

    Posted by Colleen on October 14, 2020 at 7:41 pm

    Does PH ever make its way into your dreams? If it does, is it in nightmare form? When you see yourself in dreams do you have PH or are you unaware of having it?

    I have definitely had nightmares about PH, even post-transplant. They often revolve around caring for Cullen’s central line and Flolan. But I also have had nightmares about trying to balance everything between PH and life in general.

    Tell us about your dreams. They don’t have to be about nightmares. Maybe you have had some happy PH dreams. I would love to hear about those too.

    Colleen replied 9 months ago 5 Members · 12 Replies
  • 12 Replies
  • jen-cueva

    Member
    October 15, 2020 at 11:28 am

    Great topic, @colleensteele! I often have dreams where I am running. Most often, it is running up a flight of stairs. I have no oxygen or wearing a backpack in these dreams.

    But, I also have had nightmares; usually, this has been when I am having rough days or the night before an appointment or procedure.

    As a mom and a caregiver, I can only imagine the nightmares of trying to balance it all. Did you ask Cullen this? I would like to know if he more pre or post-transplant. How about you?

    So, I do have both, and I bet most of us have. I hope to hear more from others, too.

  • jimi-mcintosh

    Member
    October 20, 2020 at 5:54 pm

    Dreams are more like a repeat episode of the walking dead. It is like someone turns off the oxygen and you wake gasping for air. I try to turn my mind off, focus on positive things like the COVID vaccine actually cures PH. I know that I am losing it,3 operations, 7 COVID test, kidney is still stage 4-5.

    My energy level is very erratic and minimal activity is exhausting. Good news, my vision is now 20/80 promises to get better after the cataract removal.
    I still remain positive that I will see some improvement by mid-2021. I dream of better days, taking a trip cross country.

  • Colleen

    Member
    July 6, 2021 at 12:45 pm

    Since I had a nightmare last night I thought I would bring this topic up again.

    Last night I had a really bad dream about Cullen. I haven’t had a bad one in a long time. I know what triggered it. He has been experiencing some shortness of breath and minor chest pains lately. Nothing too severe but enough to remind me that his health will always be fragile.

    I dreamt that I approached Cullen’s hospital room and was stopped by a doctor who told me he passed away. Shocked, I slowly walked away without asking to see him. Next thing I know they are removing his covered body and I start screaming that before they take him I need to see him and hold his hand one last time.

    Such a horrible dream! Anyone else experience really bad ones like this? Do you find it kind of lingers with you throughout the day? Is there anything you try to think about as you fall asleep to lure your dreams into a more pleasant direction?

    How are you managing your dreams these days @jimi?

  • aunt-lizzie

    Member
    July 9, 2021 at 2:10 am

    Well I don’t know if it’s PH or COVID, but I have been having the most vivid dreams for the past few months.  It’s been a year and a half of worrying about going to the shops or using public transport in case I contracted COVID, and now we are halfway through a 3 week lockdown here in Sydney so perhaps it’s just me getting out and about without contravening lockdown regulations.  No nightmares just very busy dreams with lots of characters in them.   Now I just have to work out how I can go grocery shopping in my dreams – that would be helpful.

    • Colleen

      Member
      July 9, 2021 at 2:31 pm

      @auntlizzie is the 3 week lockdown part of your dream or has that really been happening? If so, is it because there have been a flux of Covid cases again? It must feel like a living nightmare.

      Had to laugh at your thought about grocery shopping dreams. I often have dreams where I accomplish something I have been putting off and it’s so disappointing when I wake and realize…nope, still needs to get done!

  • aunt-lizzie

    Member
    July 9, 2021 at 11:32 pm

    Hi Colleen.  Nope – the lockdown is not a dream – it’s real, and we are waiting to see if they add another week on that.  Quick in and out grocery shopping and no browsing, only 2 can exercise outside together, 10 people at funerals, not to go more than 10 km from home, etc, etc and of course masks everywhere.  As the hot spots creep closer to my grocery store, I am starting to dig in to my atomic war supplies such as dried goods and frozen stuff.   It may sound a low number to anyone in your neck of the woods, but yesterday’s number of confirmed cases was 439 just in our State, and mostly in Greater Sydney area.   I am totally Pfizered so should be OK if I do catch something. Educational Webinars are keeping me sane.

    Keep safe.

    • Colleen

      Member
      July 12, 2021 at 2:17 pm

      I’m really sorry to hear this @auntlizzie. In my area I feel like things have gotten too lax. I don’t want us to be in lockdown but it’s bothering me that in most areas people are no longer expected to wear masks. Wouldn’t a happy medium for your area and mine be nice?

  • Colleen

    Member
    July 12, 2021 at 2:20 pm

    As I mentioned I recently had a bad nightmare about my son/It inspired this week’s column. Share whether you can relate or not.

    https://pulmonaryhypertensionnews.com/2021/07/12/ph-transplant-nightmares/

  • Colleen

    Member
    June 29, 2023 at 12:53 am

    I thought I would bring this topic up again and see if anyone has new dreams to share.

    I have you ever dreamt that you did something you needed to do and wake up confused and thinking you really did it?

    Between being sick for a week and grieving I haven’t had a healthy sleep routine. Well, today I was feeling better. Cough wasn’t as bad as it’s been but I felt exhausted. In the middle of the day I fell into a very deep sleep and do you know what I dreamt? I dreamt that I got on the forums and did my work for the day. For the rest of the day I kept thinking I did just that but I started to question it after dinner tonight. Sure enough, it was a dream so here I am late at night catching up with everyone. Sorry!

    So, who can relate to this crazy situation?

    • jen-cueva

      Member
      June 29, 2023 at 11:56 am

      Hi @colleensteele, thanks for sharing this topic again. I have dreamed I did something at times. When I was working as a nurse happened more frequently. I woke up and had to review my notes from the day prior.

      It sounds like your body needed that nap. When that happens, please don’t worry about the forums. After dinner, you could have rested and spent time with the boys.

      It’s not too crazy, or we are both a tad crazy. Hehe.

  • joanne-sperando

    Member
    June 29, 2023 at 4:05 pm

    Wow, I’m so glad you posed this question. My brother John (passed in 2015 after 20 years with PH) used to have bad dreams about his pump getting wet (he was on Flolan IV). I also had pump malfunction dreams. I guess when you rely on a device for your very life, it’s right there in our subconscious, conscious and everywhere else.

    • Colleen

      Member
      June 29, 2023 at 5:01 pm

      @joanne-sperando I can so relate to those Flolan dreams! My son was on IV Flolan for 6 years. I remember having nightmares that I forgot to change the cartridge on his pump. Upon wakening I would run into Cullen’s room to check on his Flolan even through I knew it was just a dream. It’s crazy how powerful our minds are even when we are sleeping!

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