How Is Your Mental Health This Week?

[Jill Upshaw]

My mental health is up and down to say the least. I do feel better when I can get out but that is limited to short amounts of time and not far from home. I know we are all different and we are in different stages but I am going to get a 3rd shot as soon as I can take it. I don’t want a repeat of last winter. All of this press is getting to me. I really don’t watch it much. Just want the best for all of us and a safe winter.

[Colleen]

@upshtcx I think more people than not are struggling with their mental health these days, and if you add PH to all the other unknowns life has to offer these days, it makes things even more difficult.

It sounds like you are making wise decisions and caring for yourself as best you can, and that included limiting the amount of national or worldwide news you expose yourself too. As I tried to advise my parents, it is important to stay informed, but that doesn’t mean you need to listen to it all 24/7.

Anytime you need a friendly place to share your feelings and be heard, I hope you know here is where you can find it.

[jen-cueva]

Hi @upshtcx, I am sending you extra hugs from Texas. I can certainly understand your concerns.

As @colleensteele mentions, staying informed but not consumed by all media and news is important for our sanity. My hubby watches the news when he gets home, so I do not watch any until then. That is often too much for me, so we are all different and must do what we can to protect our mental health.

Please know that sharing your concerns here is welcome, and we hope that you feel safe and post anytime that you need to vent.

[Jill Upshaw]

Colleen,
Thank you. Glad you are back. Caring for parents is a commitment all its own. I took care of mine over a 13 year span. However, I felt good about being there.

[Colleen]

@upshtex your parents were fortunate to have such a loving and devoted daughter. I have no doubt that caring for them meant as much to you as it did to them.

[jen-cueva]

Hi @colleensteele, I am certain that your parents appreciated all you did and tried to teach them. Although you probably feel like it went by too fast, you made an impact, and I know that they will be safer and wiser because of you.

Like for instance, getting that shower chair out together for your mom! I remember when I ordered one for my stepdad when he needed it to be delivered. I read so many reviews making sure that it was easy to assemble. Thankfully, the hospice home health young lady was there, she helped, and they got that and the grab bars both done at once. Jessica is still a part of the family.

@upshtcx, wow, 13 years, I am certain that was heavy for you bit as you mention, you are so happy that you could be there to help. I know my parents are out of state, and I feel guilty.

My daughter is also out of state. They had planned to leave before I got COVID last year. I only remember her telling me that she would wait, and I told her, as always, go live your life, baby, Dad and I will be OK. She is really great about calling throughout the week. We cut back from several times per day, hehe. Yes, she is an only child. We will be with them a few days next week to celebrate her birthday, so I am super excited.

[Jill Upshaw]

Enjoy your visit with her for sure. The best thing you can do for your kids is making them strong enough to live their own lives and be happy. My aunt had 6 kids and when we were all little, she could not stand hearing any of us yelling, crying, etc. She partnered each kid with another kid and made them in charge of each other’s happiness. If you went complaining or crying, she would simply say, don’t come to me, I am not in charge of your happiness, go find……Sounds so simple but to this day her kids are in their 60’s and 70’s and each one still watches out after the one they were partnered with as a child. Made for a peaceful house and good relationships.

[jen-cueva]

Thank you, @upshtcx; I am so excited, although it is only a few days. I love spending time together.

Wow, such a sweet share about your aunt. I love that! Others could learn from that, for sure.

My daughter is an only child, minus Sasha, our fur baby, lol. So, it was so difficult at first when she left home. But I knew that we taught her well, and although I kept thinking of so many things I could have done or forgotten as she left for college, I was and continue to be so proud of her.

Isn’t it crazy once our babies grow up and are little adults? So exciting to watch and cheer her on as she continues to soar.

[Aunt Lizzie]

Hi Everyone,  Mental health?  Well I thought I was OK.  Not watching the News too much and keeping masked up when out at the supermarket or whatever.  Here in Australia we are just coming into Spring, but our COVID case numbers in my State – New South Wales – are looking bad for our population size.   Our State Premier just announced a further lockdown until end of September, curfews in some areas and a further restriction on travel which is a radius of 5km from home at present.  I participate in some interesting Webinars, some paid some free and this keeps me sane.  But then the troubles in Afghanistan happened this past week and I got very emotional watching those poor people suffering.  It was just another disaster on top of the virus and worries about Climate Change and its affects on weather everywhere.  I am OK, but I just have to focus on what I can control and distance myself a bit from what I cannot.  Lots of phonecalls to and from friends and relatives since this thing began, is wonderful solace.  Stay well, friends.

 

 

[jen-cueva]

Hi @auntlizzie, I am so happy to have you join us again.

I feel your anxiety and frustration as we try to balance all of this negative news worldwide. The events that you mention are on my mind, too. It is so much at once. It is difficult to disconnect, and I only watch the news a little.

Oh no, the lockdown is sad but hoping this will prevent many COVID cases. This new variant is scary, to say the least, more so that those vaccinated are getting it, too. Most of what I read and hear, the vaccinated do tend to have a lighter case.

You make a great point; we need to not worry about what we cannot control. This is important but also is an ongoing struggle for me. Do you find this true for you, too?

What types of webinars are you interested in? Do you have any that others may find helpful?

Certainly, phoning friends and family will help as you are once again on lockdown. Please pop in any time and let us know how we can best support you. I am sending you hugs from Texas.

[Colleen]

@auntlizzie it sounds like you are suffering the effects of having a kind and compassionate heart. It is so hard to follow world news and not be overcome with emotion. Have you tried journaling? I find that writing my feelings down helps me clear my head and figure out what among my list of worries I have the power to control.

It is always good to hear from you and I am happy to hear that you are spending some time on things that you enjoy and reaching out to friends.

Remember, we are always here for you too!

[Randolph Reynolds]

I suppose this is a good forum to relate some things I’ve mentioned before but first I have a question for auntlizzie.  How bad is the lockdown in Australia?  Yesterdays news report, I think it was Fox using information from Sky News, suggests that those people who do not wear masks were being arrested.  That seems particularly off base.  Can it be so that a free, really independent nation, can succumb to a ‘police state’.

In the U.S. the tensions rise as the Center of Disease Control cannot explain the use of masks.  There are very few people in my little town in Arizona that a bothering with masks.  I just received a booster vaccination because of my age and PAH.  Yet I feel obligated to wear a mask but have no direction on that at all.  In this country the attitude appears to be that we will do what we choose to do.

On the topic of anxiety I have mentioned that some ten years ago I was labeled as having Anxiety Disorder.  Anytime a psychiatrist pins a label on you I sense that is his category for opening you up to some new medication.  If I do have a ‘disorder’, probably due to my experiences of being competitive, especially as a fighter pilot, but I have learned on my own to over come it.

One source of anxiety is generated from our new media, and to a certain extent the social media.  I have a need to keep in touch with the latest events, such as the botched withdrawal from Afghanistan. Actually I am learning that my generation (Vietnam) is witnessing a complete paradigm shift from what my comrades believed was a healthy society into one that is coming apart looking for a new way of living.  The world order is changing and this is upsetting.  Nestled away in northern Arizona we are not immune to these changes but in time everyone will become anxious about their freedom.

I appear to have run amok.  Perhaps the reality of our own lives produces all the anxiety and depression that we need.

[Colleen]

@ripple76 there really is an awful lot to worry about these days, personally, nationally, worldwide. I worry for all of us on many levels. The news is like a train wreck you can’t avert your eyes from. But I recommend that you try. I’ve been suggesting the same to my parents. My dad is a retired Marine so a lot of what he is seeing is hard for him to watch too.

Can you limit your news watching time and social media presence? I know you enjoy writing. Have tried keeping a journal? Doing that is a great stress reliever for me.

As far as the masks go, my family keeps wearing theirs but we were use to this pre-pandemic because of my son’s transplant. I do wish their could be more unity about protecting ourselves and others. It doesn’t make sense when in public half of the crowd is doing one thing and the other half another. I share your frustration.

[Terry]

G’Day Randoph, I read about that Fox report. He was a bit over the top BUT in certain States this new power has gone to the heads of those in charge. No you don’t go to goal if not wearing a mask. If current circumstances require you wear one and you are not    the police may ask why not and offer you one OR give you an on the spot fine. Mind you if you abuse the officer you might. All states except two only require you to wear a mask indoors eg. Shopping mall.The two States require you only to go out for essentials and to wear a mask outdoors as well until they get the number of positive cases down . The issue in Aust.is that we went for zero cases and some states are unwisely still pushing for it and have locked out people from other States etc. .For various reasons we were very lax in making immunisation available hence we only have around 30-40% of population fully vaccinated and with Delta that is disastrous. By October we will be 70%.  I’m from the same generation and understand what your saying about a change.
My attitude is if I can’t change it its not worth worrying about ,if I can do something.

Back in 2017 my doc. suggested I see a psychiatrist as they could not diagnose what was wrong and decided it must be in my head . After going blind in the right eye off and on over three days I walked in told him to shutup sit and listen . I ended up in hospital with severe Temporal arteritis and against the odds they saved my eyesight. Then  I got PAH and a stent  in the ticker. Stick to your guns.

 

 

[jen-cueva]

Hi @ripple76, I can feel the frustration as I read your post. I can relate to some of your thoughts on many levels. Although, I am not a Vietnam fighter pilot.

My husband was in the Navy, and while in San Diego, we saw 2 carriers leaving out. It was no secret where they are headed. Unfortunately, one carrier just returned from a 10-month deployment and was headed back out. Watching that brought about many emotions in myself and my hubby.

Media can certainly be a major culprit as it affects our mental health. As Colleen suggests, I, too, do limit my news intake, including social media. I do want to be informed but not overly if that makes sense. I must say, while in SD, I only saw the local news one day for out 10 minutes. That and a quick check on Hurricane Ida before we headed home.

I am sending you big hugs from Texas, my friend.

[Randolph Reynolds]

I reckon it isn’t very good.  Frustrations with appointments, anxiety over grogginess in the AM, and – oh yes – the fact that I cannot get my posts to work on line.  Part of my therapy is to express myself in these forums.  Am I the only one with posting issues?

[Roger Bliss]

I was in the Vietnam era. However, I was never in the military. I watch the news and see all the weird stuff going on now. The way In keep my sanity is to look at part of the AA prayer. Basically, you have to accept the things you can not change. Maybe prayers might work?? Then you need the courage to change the things you are capable of. The biggie is you you need the wisdom to know the difference. Don’t worry about the things you can’t change…..it’s a waste of time and energy.

I also believe in personal responsibility. For example, folks know that smoking can maybe kill them, then again, maybe not. It should be their choice to choose to smoke or not. I believe in the same thing for covid……wear a mask or don’t…..get vaccinated or not. It’s none of my business. I have been vaccinated and just got my booster. I wear a mask or don’t depending on the situation. I don’t need the government to tell me what to do.

Here in Alaska I am like a loose dog. I wander around without hardly any rules. Most up here are like that. However, when I go down to America, the wife has to put a leash on me. I am not allowed to do the stuff down there I can up here. For example…..people down there frown on peeing in a gravel parking lot. Whats with that???LOL

I had trouble posting on here but Jen and Colleen got me straightened out. I am sure they can do the same for you.

[Colleen]

@wheeldog I always appreciate how you incorporate a touch of humor to your posts and comments. Thank you for giving us all a reason to smile.

[jen-cueva]

Oh, @ripple76, I hope that today you do not have any more issues posting. If you do, please do let us know. Feel free to email me if needed. I see those pretty quickly.

I am sorry that you are struggling with so much right now. We do love and want to support you here. I am working hard with IT to help resolve these posting issues for you.

@wheeldog offers some excellent tips. I love the support that he offers. It’s so important to remind ourselves not to worry about the things that we cannot change.

Thank you, Roger, for sharing that with us all, and I know that Randy will appreciate the support, too.

Of course, you never fail to add some laughter to your posts. I am laughing so hard as I picture your wife holding your leash; hehe.

Take care, my buddy.

[Roger Bliss]

Don’t laugh too hard about the leash……I think she is looking for a muzzle, but can’t find one to fit.;-)

[Colleen]

@ripple76 did you have problems posting again today? I believe @jenc is looking into the issues again for you and I will help her tomorrow if it still isn’t resolved.

It’s frustrating and I don’t want you to need therapy for your therapy. We really value all that you share in the forums and want you to get just as much out of them as we do. Don’t give up on us. We will keep working on the problem.

[Carol alexander]

Well not the best Iam in the process of losing my best friend, care giver and husband. It has just the two of us for a long while and Iam devastated I can’t stop crying I know the stress is bad for me but Iam about to lose the one I have loved for 58 years
Lost
Carol

[Colleen]

@carol-alexander my heart sank when I read your update. I am so, so sorry to hear this heartbreaking news. We can’t imagine what you are going through but know that we will do our best to support you here however we can.

You and your husband will be in my daily prayers.

[Roger Bliss]

So sorry to hear about your husband. I can’t imagine what it would be like without my wife. I wish I could come up with some words of wisdom to help you through this. However I don’t have any. I will pray for you and your husband.

[jen-cueva]

Oh no, @carol-alexander, I am sorry to hear about your husband. When did your husband start declining? I cannot begin to imagine how painful that must be. 58 years is a long time, my dear PHriend.

Is he on hospice or palliative care for support at such a difficult time?

You go ahead and cry, scream, yell, whatever it is that helps you as you go through these emotions. Please know that we are here to help you in any way that we can. You must lean on us and others that you have near you.

I don’t know how you feel, but I am here to help in any way I can. I am sending you extra big hugs from Texas. Please know that I added you and your husband to my daily thoughts and prayers.