My pain levels vary. Some days I feel “OK,” and I can go outside and enjoy myself. At other times, my pain levels are higher, and any activity leaves my body screaming by day’s end. I have moments when the pain becomes all-consuming.
When I was younger, I was always “waiting” for something to happen. I can remember at 10 years old counting down the days and hours until the next big social studies test was over. I would think, “By this exact time two days from now I will be…
“Hi, this is Brittany calling again. I’m sorry to bother you, but did you get a chance to speak with the doctor?” I have repeated that line numerous times while calling doctors’ offices. I have spent countless minutes on the phone with and sending emails…
“Rate your pain on a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the worst you ever felt.” If I have learned one thing over the past few decades, it’s that pain is almost guaranteed when living with chronic illness and pulmonary hypertension.
“It could be worse.” It’s amazing how quickly these four words make my head spin. People living with chronic illness are well aware of the fact that “it could be worse.” I know that I could be in a hospital…
One thing I have learned in my 27 years is that relationships aren’t always built to last. Some people have come into my life for a few years or a few months, and others have been in my life forever and continue to be there. The truth is…
I get anxious just thinking about what it’s like sitting in a waiting room at a doctor’s office. In waiting rooms, I pretend to keep myself occupied and distracted with just about anything. I mindlessly flip through hundreds of pictures on Pinterest or “read” the celebrity news from…
Black-and-white thinking is something that I have mastered for the majority of my life. In the psychology world, the term for this type of thinking is called “splitting.” According to Psychology Today, it is defined as “the division or polarization of…
My repeated hospitalization cycle since November has tested my physical and mental strength. When pain, fatigue, depression, and anxiety fill my thoughts, it is hard to see the positive. While in the hospital, a transition to a double-occupancy room restored my strength.
My support systems provide me with courage, sympathy, and compassion and help me to persevere in difficult moments. A large part of my support comes from an online community called the Pulmonary Hypertension News Forums. The PH News Forums have allowed me to…
“I’m sorry you have to take these days out of work.” “I’m sorry for not being able to spend a lot of time with you.” “I’m sorry this has been so hard for me.” “I’m sorry for…
Pulmonary hypertension is unpredictable in countless ways. I experience noticeable health changes throughout each day, from one hour to the next. Pulmonary hypertension has impacted the way I breathe and the amount of daily exertion for the things I love doing. Recently, it has harmed my weight…
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