Finding Time for Dates With Your Partner

As humans, forming quality relationships is essential to our well-being. If you are like me, the pandemic has tossed a wrench in our relationships, including the romantic ones.

Do you remember your last date? If not, don’t worry. Most of us have been stagnant in our dating lives lately.

With chronic illnesses like pulmonary hypertension (PH), dating can be a challenge. Finding the extra energy and the time to spend with someone can be draining, and it requires planning. 

Additionally, sometimes things go awry. But have no fear, those us of with PH always are ready for plan B, when needed. Between PH symptoms and the side effects from PH treatments, our bodies are worn out. 

I can’t imagine how the parents of a child with PH manage to block out time for each other.

My husband, Manny, and I find that most often, our dates are unplanned. If I’m feeling good, I’ll get dressed and off we go for a date. Dating doesn’t have to be complicated or expensive, although this gal does enjoy a fancy dinner once in a while. We usually save these dates for special occasions.

Jen and her husband, Manny. (Photo by Jen Cueva)

Did you know that May is Date Your Mate Month? I just recently heard about it. Dating our mates often is at the bottom of our priorities. The waxing and waning of my symptoms from PH and other coexisting illnesses usually determines what I can and can’t do on a given day.

Can you relate? Have you thought about planning some dates? May is almost over, so if you can’t get a date this month, why not do it next month?

These dates don’t need to be complex. Discover what works for you and your loved one, and try it. Being intentional is key. We must nurture our relationships, because our souls crave the connection.

Jen enjoys a cold beverage. (Photo by Manny Cueva)

Last week, Manny and I had a late lunch alfresco. It was a glorious, sunny, and breezy day. Later that evening, we went for a drive along the coast, and I savored the crisp and balmy beach air. I was exhausted after the busy evening, but it was worth it. I enjoyed every minute, and I know Manny did, too.

Jen and Manny share some delicious food. (Photo by Jen Cueva)

In honor of Date Your Mate Month, here are a few of our favorite date ideas: 

• Netflix and chill. There is nothing wrong with ordering DoorDash and bingeing on Netflix. Recently, we have watched several comedy shows.  
• Fake-out takeout. Manny and I have cooked together at times. We have made a few of our favorite takeout meals at home. Recently, we used Trader Joe’s orange chicken. I didn’t use all of the sauce, because I’m not a fan of overly sweet foods. Using leftover whole-grain rice, we made a quick stir-fry by adding egg and veggies. 
• Going for drives. Taking a much-needed drive to get out of the house works well for me. I am usually home all week, so I need the fresh air. We sing and act goofy as we catch up on the week. We’ll often order drive-thru at Starbucks or at our favorite tea spot. It’s no secret: I can’t leave the house long without being thirsty.
• Farmers markets. Going to the local farmers market is fun, and you can grab some fresh fruits and vegetables while you’re there. You’re also supporting local farmers. 
• Virtual tours. I heard about this last year but never checked it out. Traveling from the comfort of your home in pajamas is a win-win situation. Did I mention it is free? 
• Couples massage. I realize this is not a frugal date, but discount rates often can be found. Sometimes smaller spas offer discounted rates to new customers. Check around. 

Remember, it’s your relationship, so do things your way. Which of the dates above will you try? What are some of your favorite ideas for a date? Please share in the comments below.

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Note: Pulmonary Hypertension News is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Pulmonary Hypertension News or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to pulmonary hypertension.